El Empty: March 2009

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Here's the new government sponsored "recovery.gov" logo:

Now, here's the what's really going to happen:

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Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: = Eskimo Pi

2.4 miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale Univ. Hospital: = 1 I V League

2000 pounds of Chinese soup: = Won ton

1 millionth mouthwash: = 1 microscope

Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier: = Mach Turtle

365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: = 1 lite year

Half of a large intestine: = 1 semicolon

1000 aches: = 1 megahurtz

Weight an evangelist carries with God: = 1 billigram

Basic unit of laryngitis: = 1 hoarspower

Shortest distance between two jokes: = A straight line

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: = 1 bananosecond

453.6 graham crackers: = 1 pound cake

The first step of a thousand-mile journey: = 1 Milwaukee

1 million microphones: = 1 megaphone

2200 mockingbirds: = two kilomockingbirds

1000 grams of wet socks: = 1 literhosen

8 nickels: = two paradigms